These past few months have been an emotional roller coaster. I’ve experienced everything from sorrow to giggle fits. Each emotion seems to have no predictable trigger. Today, I feel guilty. I feel guilty for not being there for my friends as much as I used to. I feel guilty for being angry at a dying man for “making us” pay his bills, clean his place and tend to his business affairs. Above all, I feel guilty for just wanting him to pass away. I am exhausted. I am tired of jumping when the phone rings thinking it’s going to be ‘the call’. A dog becomes a part of your family. When your dog stops eating, no longer takes any joy in activities it used to adore and is so lethargic it doesn’t move, you lovingly put your dog to sleep. We treat family pets more humanly than people. I feel guilty for thinking that, too.
So . . . what am I going to do about this self-imposed guilt trip today? I am going to distract myself by packing some boxes and running some errands. Our new house is almost done. By next weekend the contractors should be done with our home. I am so excited about the fresh start that is right around the corner. When we leave this place, we are leaving a lot of physical, emotional and psychological baggage behind. I don’t feel so guilty about that.
Fairygodmothersister's Blog 
You do not need to be there for your friends all the time–now is the time for your friends to be there for you! There is absolutely nothing to feel guilty about. Anger at the reversal of the roles (especially for someone who never fulfilled his role in the first place) is normal. Being exhausted and wanting it to be over is normal too. We don’t expect a weight lifter to hold heavy weights for hours at a time–why should “heavy” emotions be any different? You’ve been holding them for months now.
Just remember your friends love you and are there for you. Life will return to normal (or even better than the previous normal.)